How to Dance Sexily

Dancing is one very enjoyable way to express sensuality––indeed, those who dance well are often considered to make good lovers too. Yet, not everyone feels comfortable dancing, especially when you're convinced you've got two left feet and no sense of rhythm. It's time to persuade yourself otherwise––everyone can dance and it's an experience you deserve to enjoy when seeking to attract someone or turn on a person you already love.

EditSteps

1. 1
   Feel the music. Good dancing rises from the heart and is an expression of your emotions, both your reaction to the rhythm and your feelings about the occasion. Before you even hit the dance floor, find music that makes you feel sexy. Make a playlist that includes music that makes you feel confident, relaxed, and energized.
2. 2
   Practice dancing in private. Close the door, dim the lights, and play your sexy music. Commit to spending a full 20 minutes dancing in whatever way makes you feel sexy. Don't worry about how you look. The point of this exercise is to know what it feels like to let go and dance as if nobody's watching.
3. 3
   Learn a sexy dance. Even if it's not the kind of dancing you'll do at a party or a club, learning a specific kind of dance or routine will give you some moves you can transfer into other situations and more importantly, it'll give you a boost of confidence and coordination.
   • There are definitely some dances that are considered sexier than others. Top of the list are the dances from South America, such as the tango, samba and salsa. Or try bellydancing, of Middle Eastern origins and still considered to be a very alluring dance.
   • If you don't want to attend formal dance classes, get a dance DVD or use the amazing plethora of online dance classes to teach yourself at home. Look up a choreography routine that you like and learn it!
4. 4
   Dance amongst strangers. If you're nervous about what people will think of you, consider going to a setting outside of your usual sphere so that the people you're dancing around are people you don't know. If they're strangers, who cares if you make a fool of yourself? It's not like you'll ever see them again. When you loosen about about that, you might find that your dancing draws admiration instead of ridicule.
5. 5
   Relax. More than anything, relaxation is key to feeling––and looking––sexy on the dance floor. A tense dancer looks wooden, awkward and ready to topple over. That's not sexy––it's excruciating to watch and it will cramp your style. Instead, practice relaxing and letting the rhythm wash over you. Listen for the beat and start moving in time to it, allowing your body's own reactions to be the guide.
   • If you have any hangups about being seen in public, about making mistakes, etc., then it's important to deal with these separately. Feelings of fear will hamper relaxation and will prevent you from enjoying the dance.
   • Wear comfortable, loose clothing but not too loose. If you can't move well in your clothes or you're constantly worried they're going to slip off and reveal a "wardrobe malfunction," then it'll be impossible to relax. Spend time carefully choosing your dance clothes and if need be, keep them separate from all your other clothing so that you can find them quickly whenever anyone asks you to go dancing. That's one less excuse for you to avoid dancing sexily!
6. 6
   Stay alert. When dancing, be aware of others around you. There isn't much sexy about bumping into people and elbowing them. And doing the can-can into their faces won't impress anyone. Most of all, be attuned to your dance partner. Sexiness derives from the connection the two of you establish while dancing, so keep apace of his or her moves and timing and take the utmost care to avoid tripping over them or standing on their toes. And don't be afraid to lead your partner at times, even if this is something you don't normally do. Just be sure to allow for an even balance between who leads in your partnership when dancing––a little lesson for the rest of your lives together...
7. 7
   Express yourself. Although it is helpful to learn the basics of some sort of dance, not everyone wants to do that and not everyone will find the dance steps work for every situation. Most important of all is to learn to express yourself through how you react to the music. This means having the confidence to enjoy the dance for its own sake rather than being worried about what other people are thinking or doing. Too bad if the dance crowd seems to want to jump and down but you'd like to jump sideways instead. Often it's the contrary movement that makes you appear both relaxed and confident because you dared to be different and give in to what the rhythm is telling you to do.
   • Use your thoughts to help keep you in a sexy frame of mind. See your dancing as a way to set the mood for the rest of the date, showing what you're thinking through movement.
   • One caveat to expressing yourself is knowing when to not overdo things. Your move may be unique, creative and suggestive but repeat it one times too many and it may cross over into comical and have everyone laughing as if you're deliberately poking fun. That's not sexy––it's comedic, so never go over-the-top. Remember that it's not how much you move but how you move.
8. 8
   Enjoy yourself. Tightly linked to expressing yourself is enjoying yourself. Dancing is about release, about having fun. It's not only okay to smile and laugh when dancing, it's essential when you want to loosen up. And while the professional version of a ballroom dance might see the dancers with very serious faces, trying that same look for yourself can cause you to appear fierce and unapproachable, whereas a smile can make you seem very sexy. Don't try to be overly serious––the dance floor isn't a dance competition.

EditTips

• Dance classes and dancing in general is definitely a lot more fun with a friend or even your date. It will also help you to learn how a partner responds to your moves and expressions while dancing. Doing this in a safe learning environment can let you experiment and get over the giggles when things look overdone rather than sexy! Dance with someone you trust and isn't afraid to talk openly with you as well as dance.
• Develop friendships with people who can dance well. You could learn a few things from them. Don't steal their moves, but just watch how passionate they are and see as the music flows through their bodies.
• Assess your fitness. Dancing is exercise, and especially so when it's sexy dancing. If you're fit, you'll find it easier to maintain the energy needed for dancing. If you're not so fit, find ways to improve your fitness, including using dancing as a form of fitness training. The more energy you have, the easier it will be to enjoy your dance experience.
• Consider watching "You got Served", "Stomp the Yard", or "Save the Last Dance" for tips on sexy dance moves.
• Consider experimenting in front of good friends who are willing to provide healthy feedback.

EditWarnings

• Don't experiment with new moves in front of people who you know are critical. This could result in embarrassment and the lack of confidence you feel when doing something new might translate into awkwardness rather than sexiness.
• Whenever you feel embarrassment sneaking it's way up, relax. Learn internal relaxation exercises that you can invoke no matter where you are, if you haven't already done so. And keep in mind that if you're embarrassed about how you look to your partner, it's highly likely that he or she feels the same way; and if not, it's more probable that he or she is confident enough in their own right to be considerate enough to help you learn with them. Smile. It'll be okay.
• Afraid to ask someone to dance? Just do it. If they say no, so what, it wasn't meant to be. If they do, it just might turn out to be one of the sexiest things you've ever done...

EditThings You'll Need

• Comfortable clothes and shoes suitable for dancing
• A large mirror (optional)
• Good music
• Dance classes (formal, group, online, etc.)